When I first started in the Bujinkan, the number of Shidoshi in the United States was only a fraction of what it is today. Unless you were fortunate to live near one, you had to drive, fly or ride the bus to go train. There was no internet (at least not for public use) and very little credible video (VHS tapes). You scraped money and sacrificed to get some kind of training from a Shidoshi and go back home to practice on it until you could get more training. The quality wasn't the best, either, as the information available was very limited (compared to today). Back then, a Shidoshi really did mean that you were a "teacher", because you were most often the only source for many to receive training. It was easy to fall for bad teaching, too, as students had no other sources to validate the teaching they were receiving. Nowadays, so many go to Japan and come back that it isn't hard to spend time training with someone who has trained in Japan, even if that person isn't a Shidoshi. Anybody who is off their rocker with their own made up ideas can easily be compared with others who have either training in Japan or train with someone who has trained in Japan. It is getting harder for people to set up their own cult-like empires, as they don't hold the monopoly on training anymore.
In the early years of my training, being a Shidoshi meant you could easily set up a school, write books and produce videos, with some degree of success at producing lucrative results. During the 1980's and 1990's when I first started, being a Shidoshi meant something marketable. For some, it was a career path. Now, with so many getting their Shidoshi license inside and outside of Japan, tests being performed by jugodan instead of Soke himself, being a Shidoshi means much less these days from a marketing standpoint. The only exception would be countries where the number of Shidoshi are still very few. But, overall, most people won't even blink an eye at someone coming back with a fresh, new Shidoshi menkyo.
So, why do so many still flock to take the godan test and pay the extra fee for the Shidoshi menkyo? Is there still a dream of opening a dojo and being a Bujinkan authority? Are these people viewing the Shidoshi menkyo as more important than the godan menkyo? Is the stigma of being a Shidoshi simply feeding the ego of the student? I have to confess, I was more proud of being a new Shidoshi than I was a godan. I am being brutally honest about that.
So, what does it mean to be a Shidoshi? Do people really know or do they have their own idea and seek to fill that image? What is that image and is it even realistic in today's Bujinkan?
For many, many years (and even today), the term Shidoshi has been described as "teacher of the Warrior Ways of Enlightenment" (whatever that means). But, this isn't the case. There's a blog post written recently by someone that touches on this very thing. Unfortunately, I can't remember the author's name or the link to it, but the point still hit home with me. The term Shidoshi does not mean "teacher". The term Sensei actually means "teacher". But, sensei is a term reserved for more of a technical and academic nature, like a university professor or school teacher. The sensei are teaching a specific body of knowledge and skills, like a curriculum. Soke, in all his wisdom, chose to use the term Shidoshi instead. Why? Don't we, as Shidoshi, also teach?
We do teach! Some of us have curriculum, ranking standards and so on, much like a scholastic or technical school would. In those environments, we are sensei. But, our Shidoshi menkyo doesn't say sensei. It says Shidoshi. So, there has to be more - and there is!
Being a Shidoshi is far more than being a sensei. You are not teaching, you are leading. That is a very different thing. In order to lead, you have to provide the example. You are the example. How you conduct yourself, how you approach training, how you struggle and how you grow. By being a Shidoshi, you are the lantern holder, the light bearer, to lead others along this confusing and difficult path we call Bujinkan Budo Taijutsu. You can't walk facing backwards, so your students just have to look to your light and keep following. Your responsibility is to provide the direction and their responsibility is to forge on to try and keep up.
However, from the Shidoshi's perspective, this is extremely difficult. It would be easier to just be a godan+ and focus on your own training. But, as a Shidoshi, now you have to be there for others. You are responsible for being there, for providing that example and encouraging them to keep going.
You are climbing this budo mountain, while your students are roped to you and struggling to also climb. If they don't put in the effort, they will begin to pull you and everybody else back. This is why the sempai/kohai (senior/junior) class structure is so important. If a junior level student begins to falter, their senior can help them while the Shidoshi continues. In the old days, if you were not proving your own and it became a hinderance to the rest of the class, you could be asked to leave! So, for the sake of being allowed to continue, you had to train hard to keep going. If you were weak in something, you trained even harder to make up for it. Through your commitment and hard work, you demonstrated something that others would learn from.
You were already leading by your example.
Nowadays, we see people who are high rank, yet lack certain qualities that one would expect of such a rank. I have seen grossly overweight and out of shape black belt students and even Shidoshi. I have seen high ranking teachers who couln't perform basic techniques with any real skill. They may have been complete badass students at one time, before they became such high ranking teachers, but that seemed to fade away as they progressed in rank and status. Why? How does that happen? Are they no longer training as students? Have they abandoned their own Shugyo to sit on their laurels?
Do they still embody the kind of example you want to follow? Are they still leading, or just teaching? Are they no longer a Shidoshi and just being a sensei?
If you really study Soke and the Japanese Shihan, you will notice something interesting. The older they get, the younger they seem. Soke is, what, 84 now? Other senior Japanese Shihan are also in their 70's and 80's. Yet, they are flexible, strong and able to move with incredible grace and power. They all have vibrant health and an energy that most people reaching their 60's only wish they had.
If you follow the example of Soke and the senior Japanese Shihan, do you think your health and vitality would also increase? Do you think your taijutsu would actually improve with age? Old age is no excuse for these gentlemen - why should it be for the rest of us? So, they are showing us how to live as budoka. They are providing the example. They are leading. It's up to us to try and work hard to follow. For some of us, we may need to work even harder than others.
Maybe some of us could do with a wake up call by being asked to leave our status as Shidoshi until we train enough to be considered as someone worthy of being a leader instead of a teacher. Can you imagine that?
What about the ranking menkyo you hold, even if not a Shidoshi yet. Are you worthy to be considered a sempai (senior), a leader for kohai (junior) to follow? Maybe you need a wake up call, to leave your current rank until you train yourself up enough to be the kind of sempai you should be.
For many, this probably has spurred some anger, maybe some fear. The ego attaches itself to rank easily and through this attachment, it also is easy to ignore our own truth. The ego prevents us from realizing and accepting when we have abandoned our own Shugyo under the false mask of our status, title, rank and presumed role. It is easy to fall for it. When you have students who look to you for their training, maybe even pay you for your teaching, you can become attached to that over the driving passion of furthering yourself as a student. It is attractive and, to be frank, quite entertaining to be the recipient of such attention. Also, it is normal for a teacher to devote him or her self to their students, even at the cost of their own development.
They have a title, they have a product and they have those who are willing to pay (money, time, attention) to get it. Why struggle on the difficult and challenging path of growth when one can sit back on what they know already and receive some personal and/or financial compensation for it? To continue to be a student is to be transparent, to make mistakes and question what you know. How can you have any sort of confidence as a teacher when you are vulnerable to discovering what you thought you knew was either wrong or incomplete? How can you market yourself to potential students when you yourself are forced to question your own understanding?
Yet, we expect our students to walk that path, to train hard and keep training, to accept correction and grow from it. Why do so many expect so much less from themselves, all because they now see themselves as a Shidoshi? Shouldn't a Shidoshi exemplify these qualities to the degree that not only do they provide example-centered leadership to their students, but also a real example of continued development?
To be a Shidoshi, it's not enough to just train. It's not enough to just teach. You have to lead, by example, and be the kind of student you want your students to be. Through your own example, you are teaching your students how to be students.
That is a far greater responsibility than just being a godan, as it should be. Not everybody can do it, not everybody should do it, and those who hold that title and can't live up to it should step back, refocus on being a hard training student - and grow back into being it.
Being a Shidoshi is not a job title. It's a living example of being a true budoka. Reaching that point and finally passing the sakki test for godan is one thing. Choosing to then pay the extra fees to become a Shidoshi isn't just about receiving the menkyo and having a fancy sounding title. By choosing to be a Shidoshi, you are choosing to be an example. That doesn't end. It continues even as your ranking progresses to jugodan. That's because being Shidoshi goes beyond the rank.
If you are training to be a Shidoshi, are you willing to accept that responsibility? If you are a Shidoshi, are you living and training as a living example for others to follow in their own Shugyo? Or, are you too busy teaching?
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